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Writer's pictureAlisia Maendel

Dad is Home: a poem

Updated: Oct 12, 2023

A short Memoir of one of my Dad's HEART dive recoveries for a 12-year-old suicide in 2019. While the recoveries are terrible for the grieving families, we mostly see the way this line of work impacts Dad when he comes home.



2:00am:

Dad is home

From work

Fluorescent red hum in the hall

He whispers down the hall

Broad shoulders, picking up my sleeping brother

“Dad?”

“Sh...”

Broad shoulders shaking

Hold him

To his chest


Earlier, 2:00pm:

Body cannot fill

body bag

The murmuring of the crowds around

On shore they drag him and crowd around

Red uniforms and blue uniforms, Dad takes a deep breath

For the press talk

Boy

Drowned

Pulling out body

From river bottom

Cannot return the life.


Earlier, 2:00am:

Stand on edge

Wind wailing

Stare down at water below much farther

calling that silence of peace not much farther

the duct tape discarded around wrists, pack bulges with weights

sigh

step

wind screams

and surface breaks

sink down to an embrace


"I hope Dads read the note"-

...

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