[curtain closed, secular Christmas music]
NARRATOR:
Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the town,
the hustle and bustle was live and around.
All through the streets, in the shops of this town
They stopped buying, bustling, looked around
The people, exhausted, from months of preparation
Finally sat down with some cookies milk and introspection
[Come out front of curtains, one at a time]
MR. RACTION: “It's not all my fault, I can't get any rest”
MR. FALLAWAY: It's not all my fault this season has me stressed”
MRS. NARSIST: Not my error in the slightest, that I must appear best”
ALL THREE TOGETHER: It's the fault of the corporate, seasonal giant!
[santa comes out and they point at him, he laughs “Ho Ho HO!”- do crowd work]
NARRATOR:
A lawsuit ensued, the citizens defiant-
Take one Mr. Santa A. Claus, of the North Pole onto trial
On the charge of theft, false advertisement, breaking and entering, a rising pile
The citizens of Christmas Town gather this night
The rest of the town arrives for the fight
[Curtains Open to the courtroom, bustling crowd, audience, jury]
The night before Christmas, they all seek to answer:
Who can we blame, for the peace we are after?
Who has stolen the meaning of December twenty-five
Let us see what defense the red and bearded Claus can contrive…
Scene 1
COURT MEMBER: Order, order in the court! Please rise for our honorable Judge Preva Ling Justice.
JUDGE: Thank you, you may be seated.
We are here for the case of Citizens of Christmas Town versus Santa Claus, on [adjusts glasses] wow, I see, a whole host of charges: Breaking and entering in upwards of 30 million homes yearly, theft of the joy of the citizens of Christmas town, false advertisement of christmas joy, which appears to only result in overstress, anxiety about christmas shopping, and even property damage from children who did not receive what they asked for…and finally, for the destruction of the meaning of Christmas in Christmas Town. Mr. Santa Claus, how do you plead?
SANTA: [very distracted, not paying attention to the court proceedings, and distracted by everything around him] huh? Oh yeah GUILT-
MR. RIGHTEOUS: NOT GUILTY! My client pleads NOT guilty, your honour!
SANTA: oh yeah..yeah thats right i forgot, you're a great guy mr lawyer!
JUDGE: We are gathered here on Christmas eve to settle this matter between Santa and Chrstmas town. We will proceed to our opening statements from both the defence and the plaintiffs, then move to our witnesses. Mr. Soopress, you may begin.
MR. SOOPRESS [stuck-up, arrogant, nose in air, rises and takes his time to adjust suit, tie, go to the jurors and shakes hands]
JUDGE: Mr. Conceal Soopress, please do not approach the Jurors!
MR. SOOPRESS: Sorry, my guy, sorry [raises hand mockingly and backs up, winking at the defendant box, the members of the jury are impressed with him]
My dear members of the court…your Honorable Judge Ms. Preva Ling Justice, how's the kids? Mr. Noel Righteous, how was the 4th try at the bar exam [mocking] ? You must’ve finally passed! ha!
Anyways, my dearests, sweetest court.. We are here for a case of GREAT INJUSTICE. The Town of Christmas Town, nestled in these beautiful hills, enjoys a tight-knit community that was built by our founders on a foundational truth: the preservation of the Meaning of Christmas! Our town has for decades prided itself on the beauty of our homes decked with bows of holly, walking in winter wonderlands, we are a culture that has preserved Christmas: the joys of presents, the love of figgy pudding, and that warm fuzzy feeling from hot choco. All this, has been THREATENED [the jury and citizens nod and glare] by HIM!
This old geezer! He entered the scene -I dunno when- starting with sweet promises of gifts and more fun, but his corporate empire, the present shop, the little guys in funny hats running around, the reindeer leaving their marks [gestures on the ground, holding his nose] all over our streets! all this we could forgive, could we not? If not for what is of greatest consequence: This Santa Claus stands in this courtroom GUILTY of misappropriating, wrecking, and destroying the Meaning of Christmas, which, for the Citizens of Christmas Town, lies at the heart of our culture!
My beautiful jury, today you will hear from three of your fellow townspeople, Mr. John Fallaway, your favorite grocer and shopkeeper, who keeps our cranberry sauce, turkey, and gingerbread houses in stock for this big day, and how the accused stands responsible for the deterioration of not only his family but the ability to serve his community! You will also hear from Mrs. Nancy Narsist -A kind mother, unable anymore to maintain the standards set and bars raised, and attention stolen every year by this fraud! And Finally, Mr. Avory Distro Raction, a hardworking father, like many of you, who continues to try and meet the demands of children, work, and simply the need for a break! They will together convince the court that Santa Claus has defiled our holiday, turning it away from its meaning, and outright stolen it!
[he is met by a round of applause and whoops, Judge pounds gavel]
JUDGE: Order! Order in this court!! Thank you Mr. Soopress, we will now hear from our Defense.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Hello members of the jury, judge. I’m new to this town, new to my position. But when this case came to my desk I knew I had to take it. Why? Well, I too, love Christmas. But not in the way this town might remember anymore. My client, Mr. Claus, stands here accused of ruining a holiday, sowing unrest, unhappiness, and dissatisfaction in this town. And very peculiarly, for the most interesting of charges -and I will read from the minutes directly- [takes a paper and reads this line carefully] “Misappropriating, wrecking, and destroying the Meaning of Christmas, which, For the Citizens of Christmas Town, lies at the heart of our culture.”
Members of the court, what may have passed your notice, Mr. Soopress never told you What this meaning is. How can my client steal what the Plaintiffs cannot even identify? It begs the court to consider, if the thief of this “meaning” may not be someone else in this courtroom [whispering begins]. You will hear from only one witness, and that is my client, as well as a second expert witness who will be identified shortly. My client pleaded not guilty, and it is as simple as this: He cannot and did not steal the meaning of Christmas, because I will prove to the court that there is another responsible for this theft…YOU.
[the court erupts in yells and threats, Judge hammers the gavel]
JUDGE: Order! Order in this court! Mr. Righteous, that was a bold beginning, I hope you have the evidence to support such an outrageous defense. We will now move to our witnesses. Mr. Soopress, you may call your first witness.
MR. SOOPRESS: Thank you, your honor. I would like to call Mr. John Fallaway to the stand.
COURT MEMBER: Mr. Fallaway do you swear to tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you God?
MR. FALLAWAY: Yeah yeah hurry up, I got a store to run, the kids watching the shop and I don't pay them to get my time wasted. Time is money and I gotta go!
MR. SOOPRESS: Mr. Fallaway, could you please tell the court the events of the past few Christmases that bring you here today?
MR. FALLAWAY: It would be my pleasure.
[curtains close, silent night plays, but is slowly drowned out by the nutcracker theme to show increasing chaos and forgetfulness of christmas meaning.]
Scene 2
[This is read off-stage, while silently acted]
MR. FALLAWAY: I'm an honest guy. I run my shop, I pay my bills, I love my wife and my shop provides the basics needed for a good Christmas bash. I opened my shop on the 25th of December 20 years ago. Me, Merry, and the kids were in love with the place: Peace and Joy ran up and down the isles. My wife set up the nativity set she had gotten from her mother to decorate out front. Early on the customers came in bustling. Things were simpler back then, they didn't just come to shop, they came to chat, and hang out. Joy and Peace knew all our customers by name and they all knew them.
Early on our shop was so successful that all these extra funds we made during the Christmas season well exceeded our family's expenses. We Gathered them up and on Christmas Eve we closed shop to spend the day at the local Shelter, donating presents, food and money to the local families that needed it. [laughs to himself] This time in our lives was probably our family's happiest.
But things started to change. something changed. I think it's all his fault -Mr Claus here. competition arrived in town: Mr. Comp Tition opened a shop just across the street from us he had one of those corporate contracts, so he could mark down his prices by almost 20% any price I could offer. Stress started to rise. we panicked we started working overtime, extending our Christmas sales and advertisements longer and bigger. But we lost customers, loyal customers, by the droves because he could offer bigger trees, better decorations, juicier hams, and brighter lights! All this became too much for Merry: she left during the holidays to stay at her mother's. Joy and Peace started to join her too. It's fine, I'm too busy anyway. Too much to do, and it's the biggest season of the shop as is! Mr. Claus came into my office 10 years ago and we made a deal. We shook on it: he would advertise for my business and be the face and name of the Christmas spirit! He and I worked around the clock to promote the Christmas spirit which made the shop more successful than ever! Of course, some remodeling was in order to make room for him in the front window to properly advertise. No big deal. Oh and obviously to pay for this expense other funds had to be rearranged- but things were going great! we were richer than we'd ever been. Merry doesn't like it, sometimes dreams of the small good ol’ days…ah well, we’re running a business. Time is money after all.
MR. SOOPRESS: Mr. Fallaway, could you tell the court what realization you stumbled upon in December of this year?
MR. FALLAWAY: Absolutely! Anyways, early this year I was looking around, and something wasn't right. It occurred to me that Christmas wasn't what it used to be in Christmas Town. Then! I realized something! I saw Mr Claus here over there in Mr. Comp Tition’s window as well! He’d monopolized our advertising!
MR. SOOPRESS: Mr. Fallaway, would you say that the meaning of Christmas, the merriment, the joyfulness, and that warm peaceful feeling we all remember seems to have disappeared?
MR. FALLAWAY: Yes! Exactly! I talked with some of the locals over here, and we all felt the same way. Santa Claus’ face all over the place, and the feeling of good cheer just ain't right. It hasn’t felt the way it did back then for a long time, and, coincidentally, it seems to overlap with this guy showing up, shaking hands and moving in. Something’s missing I tell you! And he stole it!
MR. SOOPRESS: Thank you Mr. Fallaway! No further questions.
[curtain close, set up court scene again]
Scene 3
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Mr Fallaway, do you know at what particular time you remember my client, Santa Claus first appearing in your shop?
MR. FALLAWAY: Not the day no, I'm a busy man, i've got customers to accommodate, mouths to feed I-
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Mr. Fallaway, please estimate to the best of your abilities.
MR. FALLAWAY: Well…huh, must have been about 10 years ago, the girls were a little older, and started getting crazier in the shop earlier and earlier with Comp Tition just over the road. I hired Mr. Claus because people recognized him and the advertisement he provided boosted sales. Merry, Joy, and Peace didn't take to him that much, but like I said, we were busy, and sales are sales!
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Mr. Fallaway, what changed?
MR. FALLAWAY: I'll tell you, Mr. Righteous, what changed! This sleazy, no-good two-faced LIAR was advertising the exact same thing in Comp Titions shop! Didn't even change the Christmas slogans we used. Im not a happy man Mr. Righteous. I am a man robbed of the very thing that once brought me joy and the thief has a big white beard and ho ho ho’s at it all.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: So Mr. Fallaway, you said you and your daughters used to take these extra Christmas earnings to the local shelter, do you remember what changed?
MR. FALLAWAY: I know what you're implying Mr. Righteous and I don't like it! I’m an honest man, but in this economy, with this competitive air, at this time of year!? The key was reinvesting it!
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Why Mr. Fallaway, did you feel the need initially to give these funds in the first place on the 25th of December?
MR. FALLAWAY: [annoyed] Because it's charity Mr Righteous, have you heard of it? The tax break is fantastic too!
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Mr Fallaway, how did Merry feel about it?
MR. FALLAWAY: About what?
MR. RIGHTEOUS: This relocation of money?
MR. SOOPRESS Objection! Relevance!
JUDGE: Objection sustained. Mr. Righteous,
MR. RIGHTEOUS: But why then? Why on christmas?
MR. FALLAWAY: Because It’s a holiday! [grows increasingly annoyed]
MR. RIGHTEOUS: A holiday celebrating what, Mr. Fallaway?
MR. FALLAWAY: Why…coming together? thankfulness, good food, good company, good wine… good-
MR. RIGHTEOUS: But why Mr. Fallaway? And to whom are you thankful? Can you recall?
MR. FALLAWAY: I-
MR. RIGHTEOUS: You knew once mr., Fallaway, I know this, I know this whole court- this whole town once did, but I think you can't recall because you misplaced this memory. Did you not?
Mr. SOOPRESS: Objection you honor! Leading to witness!
JUDGE: Objection sustained.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Alright. Mr. Fallaway, I have one last question. What happened to that nativity set?
MR. FALLAWAY: What?!
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Don't you recall? First opening shop, your wife decorated the front of your new shop with a nativity scene: a stable, some animals, shepherds, two parents and most certainly a baby. What happened to it?
MR. FALLAWAY: We– we needed the room for the Santa display outfront for better advertising. It faced Comp Tition’s storefront and we needed something more eye-catching! [very defensively]
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Where is it now?
MR. FALLAWAY: I– I’m not one hundred percent sure, Mr. Righteous, how can I be expected to remember something like that?
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Please take an educated guess
MR. FALLAWAY: I suppose in our attic for storage, it was a gift from Merry’s mother after all.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: So Mr. Fallaway, can you confirm that you, sir, did in fact replace that small display with the advertisement image of Mr. Claus in order to increase sales in your shop for the duration of the Christmas season? [says this triumphantly/confidently]
MR. FALLAWAY: What are you getting at? [offended]
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Answer the question Mr. Fallaway.
MR. FALLAWAY: [Quiety, whispers] yes.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Please speak up
MR. FALLAWAY: YES! Yes, I did! What does it matter? I'm a busy man, I'm an honest man, I love my wife, and I gave to charity while I could! Competition is crazy, this economy is insane, and this fraud here stole the joy straight out of a job I used to love! If you're implying that’s on me, why I’ll-
JUDGE:: That is enough Mr. Fallaway. Mr righteous, is that all?
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Yes your honor, I have no further questions.
[fallaway angrily returns to his spot, glaring at Righteous]
JUDGE: Mr Soopress, you may call your next witness.
[Soopress is a bit frazzled by the last cross-examination, clears throat and regains his composure]
MR. SOOPRESS: Yes..yes well…I call Mrs. Nancy Narsist to the stand
COURT MEMBER: Mrs. Narsist, do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help you God?
MRS. NARSIST: Who? Oh! Yes, of course.
MR. SOOPRESS: Hello Mrs. Narsist, you look lovely today! Would you please tell the court why you are here today? tell us… tell us your story.
Scene 4
[The same silent night theme plays and changes, as Mr. Narcissist narrates]
MRS. NARSIST: It would be my greatest pleasure! so my name is Mrs. Narcist and I run a boutique and a salon out of my home, as well as several lines of skincare and home remedies -and everything is gut healthy. When I married my dear husband, Mr Narsist 20 years ago, I was very delighted to fully commit myself to the Christmas spirit of Christmas Town. We started hosting Christmas banquets from the beginning. We figured, why not invite everyone? no one was exempt. I particularly enjoyed this time, I was running my feet off prepping for these events, but learned so much about the conditions of those around me. It was just such a joyous time! Well, the parties changed -People also very much appreciated our Decor, so we outdid our previous year's decor, and it became a fun challenge, “how can we beat last year's success?” We went above and beyond from the beginning to make our house the biggest, the brightest, the fanciest, the grandest, place for our Christmas banquets. I believe we were instrumental in inspiring our neighbors and community to host similar parties -never as successfully of course-
Anyways it was around this time that we were introduced to Mr Claus. We were invited to partner with Mr Claus who sponsored even greater company events in the name of Christmas and his brand of gift delivery and general Christmas delights.
Of course, these changes also changed the attendance of the parties- it became a more sophisticated, refined event. After all, to keep up with the Jones’ required more expensive catering and better dress codes- and this meant certain people no longer found a place in the crowd. I believe the host can only offer the party, and people meet the expectations, or maybe it just isn’t a class for them. I committed myself fully to creating the biggest and brightest and the best of parties for a new audience that could properly appreciate my talents in the way those…less privileged in my community ever could.
However, it came to my attention just this past month that Mr. Claus, who attended all our parties -as you see, he is the “mascot” of the celebrations, as it were, I of course remain the host and the face of the night…anyhow, he soon gathered around himself quite a large crowd. They weren't listening to me, they were busy listening to his Grand stories of dropping presents on chimneys and adventures all over the world.
[curtains close, reset courtroom]
MRS. NARSIST: It's my home after all! I'm the host! It is basic, civil courtesy to give..proper attention to the hostess- after everything I have DONE for this Town! I was just at the whims of this Christmas Empire he was creating! I think he was taking advantage of my services, my talents, my expertise and my magnetism, with nothing left over for ME! So I think I was taken advantage of, and Mr Claus definitely stole the joy and the meaning out of my Christmas.
Scene 5
[curtains open, courtroom]
MR. SOOPRESS: Thank you Mrs Narsist, for this delightful story! It was though I was at one of your parties, and I'm particularly looking forward to your Eve after the Christmas Eve Gala.
MRS. NARSIST: Why thank you Mr. SOOPRESS! Absolutely my pleasure; I live to serve!
MR. SOOPRESS: I have no further questions
JUDGE: Thank you. Mr. Righteous, you may begin your cross-examination.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Mrs Narsist, I'm unfamiliar with your parties… I'm wondering-
MRS. NARSIST: Unfamiliar?! I advertise them months in advance! everyone who's anyone attends. Mr Righteous I find it hard to imagine you haven't heard of them at least.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: I can't say that I have but I am very intrigued especially about the origins of these lavish feasts that you host.
MRS. NARSIST: Oh I wouldn't say lavish… [very flattered] well I suppose that would be correct, they are quite elegant!
MR. RIGHTEOUS: You said they started out because you and your husband enjoyed hosting, especially to aid people who could not afford Christmas parties, or had families to go to.
MRS. NARSIST: We do love serving our community, especially those less fortunate. I believe those of us that I have been blessed with so many gifts must give back to our communities-it's only right .
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Mrs. Narsist, you say you were contracted by Mr Claus to start hosting these parties to increase sales and customers buying into his present organization, is that correct ?
MRS. NARSIST: Yes, and I'll be the first to say I'm not falling for your tricks like Mr. Fallaway, no matter what sneaky you pull, loving my job is not a crime! Inviting who i want is not illegal–
MR. RIGHTEOUS: You mentioned that the people you invited changed. would it be fair to say that you stopped inviting the homeless, the sick, the destitute, and the widowed and started inviting only those of the same class and the same opinion as yourself?
MRS. NARSIST: You look here Mr Righteous, I am a busy woman and I run several companies. I have put my time into these types of people. The nature of my work and passions changed, that is ALL. It is not my fault that for our invites, Christmas cards, and PR photos require a certain refinement of character! It doesn't look that good when someone stands in dirty khakis and an oversized coat in the background of a photo surrounded by smart suits. It is a favor on my part that i no longer invite them because they would simply feel out of place. it's better these people don't show up, it might sound harsh, but that's just the way it is. The soup kitchens offer a Christmas brunch, if they want something home-y. I think I've done my part!
MR. RIGHTEOUS: All right Mrs. Narsist. You say that your problem with Mr Claus is the fact that you no longer felt like you were receiving the credit you deserved for all the work you were putting into these banquets.
MRS. NARSIST: Exactly he was stealing the joy and the meaning out of serving the community and making it all about himself.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Mrs. Narsist why were you hosting these parties to begin with?
MRS. NARSIST: duh! to serve the community to help those in need and I feel that that is how I can use my god-given talents in the world!
MR. RIGHTEOUS: In the world, Mrs. Narsist, or to Serve Yourself because you are surrounding yourself with a particular crowd that can appreciate it and give you all the praise, instead of the one who gave you these resources-
Would it be fair Mrs Narsist to possibly say that the attention you're accusing my client of stealing is exactly what you yourself stole from your own original purpose in hosting, which started out from a place of goodwill and charity.
MR. SOOPRES: Objection your honor, leading the witness
JUDGE: Objection overruled.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Thank you, your honor, I have no further questions.
[curtains close]
Scene 6
[Mr. Distro Raction narrates as scene of is families christmas is acted out]
MR. SOOPRES: Would you please tell the court why you are here?
MR. DISTRO RACTION: uh, um, yeah, yeah, sure…uh, hi, my name is Avory Distro Raction, and I'm just a regular guy. I'm here to represent us normal towns folk who just want some answers and justice. For my family and I, Christmas is a very busy time in our lives. Every Christmas we had simple celebrations in our home.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Could you describe to the court what those celebrations would consist of?
MR. DISTRO RACTION: Well, we spent some time as a family reading the Christmas story and singing songs, then my wife would make a nice supper. I usually work some extra hours in the week's coming up to Christmas just so I could afford something more expensive for the kids. We kept the presents simple, but as they got older demands started to rise.
10 years ago with introducing Mr Clause into our town I think we parents embraced him and his present-giving ways because it was a way to put a little bit of ease on us because the children would behave themselves knowing that he's watching them and knowing that the consequences were less presents or more presents.
But i never liked that, it didn't match up with the story i was reading my kids right before every christmas eve.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: And what story was that Mr, Distro Raction?
MR. DISTRO RACTION: Well the Story in the Gospel of Luke. See, I don't want my kids to be on good behavior right at Christmas for a reward, because…because it makes life into a game. The story I wanted them to understand was about God who loved these kids and sent his son, regardless of if they were good or bad, to gift them life.
Last Christmas Eve we were unwrapping presents and realized it wasn't joyful anymore. I enjoyed being there with my family but by the time i sat down on christmas eve with my wife and the kids, id been putting in weeks worth of overtime to pay for the decor, the presents, the food, yadda yadda yadda- but what a waste! I lost that time in a way too! But I can't recall what there was before we had all these things, all this stuff, all this noise.
[curtains close]
MR. DISTRO RACTION: Mr Righteous, i've been listening to your cross examinations, and you are correct, I don't remember. But I’d be stupid to not see one common denominator. that's Mr. Claus coming into our town and becoming the face of Christmas. I don't want him to be the face of Christmas anymore but I don't know what we'd make the face of Christmas anymore.
Scene 7
[curtains open, courtroom]
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Thankyou Mr Distro Raction, no further questions your honor.
[Aside, Mrs. Narcissist to Mr. FALLAWAY]
MRS. NARSIST: Why didn't he ask him all the questions he asked us?
MR. FALLAWAY: Avery was a bit of a weak link on our team, his christmas spirit isn't as committed to the Christmas Town cause as the rest of us. He’s ok with being small and noiseless, and reading old stories with the kids. Then here he goes and agrees with the defense that he's lost some joy. We’ve all lost joy! Mr. Righteous is implying it's our fault! [both continue to whisper disapprovingly together]
MR. SOOPRES: I have no further witnesses, your honor. I think the case against Mr. Claus is well and truly built.
JUDGE: Very well, Mr. Righteous, you may call your first witness.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Thank you, your honor I would like to call Santa Claus to the stand.
[everyone looks to the person sitting beside Mr. Righteous]
You all seem surprised, but the person sitting beside me is NOT Santa Claus. What is your name by the way?
SANTA: Thank you for being the first person to ever ask me that! I’m–
MR. SOOPRES: –If you’re going to ask him questions, get him on the witness stand!
MR. RIGHTEOUS: He’s not one of my witnesses.
MR. SOOPRESS: I don't care, judge, get this guy up there.
JUDGE: Would you please step up to the stand?
COURT MEMBER: Would you please inform the court Who You Are.
SANTA: They all know me as Santa Claus Ho Ho HO!
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Right. [air quotes] “Santa,” Would you tell the court what brought you to this town to begin with?
SANTA: Why from the invitation of the townspeople. I thought that was pretty obvious.
Scene 8
[curtains close and open to the same three scenes, but from Santa’s vantage point, being welcomed into the lives of all three witnesses, and slowly taking over]
MR. RIGHTEOUS: What do you mean by invitation?
SANTA: I came looking into town a couple times over the decades to see where I could set up shop. I needed a town that was prepared to really embrace the lights, the bustle, The Hub, the loudness, and the overall commotion that my Christmas services provide. Christmas Town wasn't always Christmas Town as you see it today, they didn't always want the Christmas I offered. They changed, and then slowly, like Mr. Fallaway, they hired me to advertise. Like Mrs. Narsist, they contracted me to increase their popularity. Or like Mr. Distro Raction, they wanted the excitement I offered. They welcomed me, so I came in. It was all perfectly within my legal rights.
.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Mr Claus, What is your purpose in this town? Was it to steal christmas?
SANTA: I've never made it a secret Mr. Righteous, you all just chose to ignore my intent. My purpose is to make this time of year the biggest, brightest, loudest, celebration of the year. My corporation is not concerned about the emotional state of our customers, only that they continue to invest in our services. who falls by the wayside is secondary. Admittedly I had to wait until my competitor- the main character of the Christmas Story, was forgotten, and minimized in importance, before I could remarket Christmas. I intend to continue unless I am no longer welcome.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: What do you mean with Welcome?
[curtains close, and stay closed to emphasize this line. Haunting Carol of the Bells]
SANTA: By no longer welcome I mean that sales will simply decrease, and people will no longer invest.. it's not that complicated Mr Righteous, I never committed a crime- I never stole anything that wasn't given to me freely.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Thank you Mr Claus I have no further questions.
Scene 9
[curtains open, courtroom]
MR. SOOPRES: Ok old guy, you claim to not be actual Santa Claus. Then who are you?
SANTA: Santa Claus isn't a real name! It's a fluke. A stage name as it were. None of you ever bothered to ask, I guess. Santa Claus sells the product and improves the sales. YOU should all understand that much. My REAL name is Deeseet Dis Sention.
[Mr. Soopres turns in horror to Mr. Righteous, confused]
MR. SOOPRES: Then where is the real Santa Claus?! Get this guy out of here [waves hand dismissively] I have no further questions.
JUDGE: Well that was strange…Mr. Righteous, if this man isn't your client, then who is?
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Your honor, I would like to call the real Santa Claus to the stand: Saint Nicholas of Myra
COURT MEMBER: Mr Nicholas of Myra do you swear to tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth to help you God?
St. NICHOLAS: Most certainly.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Saint Nicholas of Myra would you please tell the cort what brings you here today?
St. NICHOLAS: I believe I've been wrongly accused of participating in certain events in this town such as the theft of the meaning of Christmas, when in fact, I too have been witness to a robbery of the same nature.
Mr Nicholas could you please tell the court your story and how you understand Christmas
Scene 10
[scene change, we see a flashback to the life of Saint Nicholas]
St. NICHOLAS: Well Mr. Righteous, I am a Christian. I work as the bishop of a church in the town of Myra and have been for quite a while.I never wanted the fame but it came unexpectedly. One sunday while i was preaching, it came to my attention that in my Parish there was a family, a man with three daughters who would attend my church regularly. They were extremely poor, facing homelessness, and it came to my attention that the father could not pay a certain debt that he owed and each of his three daughters would be sold into prostitution if their father could not pay shortly. They refused to accept accept money from the church or me. I could not bare to see this Injustice, so one night I snuck out and dropped three bags with gold coins down their chimney so they knew the purpose of the funds, and also could not trace it back to me. As a christian it was my duty and responsibility to show them the same love that Christ has shown me. Well someone must have seen me and word got around and soon “Saint Nicholas of Mayra” became “Santa Claus” of the North Pole who drops everything down chimneys around the world for all if they earn it! [angry]
Scene 11
[Curtains close and open to the courtroom again]
MR. RIGHTEOUS: So Mr. Claus -er, I mean, Saint Nicholaus, What is your problem with this lawsuit?
St. NICHOLAS: I understand that I am being sued here but I have not stolen anything. In fact, I wish to accuse the Town of Christmastown for their negligence that allowed the meaning to be misplaced and stolen!
[the people explode in anger and yell at st. Nicholas]
JUDGE: Order! Order in the court!! St. Nicholas, continue?
St. NICHOLAS: [rising and saying this to the audience] The meaning of Christmas is simple: It is the Christmas story- the Good News of Great Joy for All people! the Gospel of Jesus Christ. We are all born sinners, so Christ sent his son to be born as a human to live as we live to walk as we walk and to experience what we experience in a fallen world -with one exception: he did not sin. And so he took on the brokenness of all of creation, so that we could be free! He died for those Sins, paying the penalty and restoring us to a right relationship with God the Father. This is the only reason we should celebrate Christmas, to remind us to love as Christ loved and to serve my community as Christ served.
[Behind, the court members all move to stage left, while Mary, Joseph, and Baby jesus enter in a dimmed stage right, they stay then, silently exit again.]
[points at the court members]
St. NICHOLAS: So I accuse you, those who sue me for the same crime. Mr. Fallaway, you started with a joy to serve the community with your shop, you had a reminder of Christ’s birth outside the window! but you chose to let the stress of competition and greed for money steal your attention until you looked up and Merry, peace, and joy were gone. Mrs. Narcist, you were given talents, yes, you used them to invite all to your feast, until the nothing they could offer you wasn’t enough. You picked praise and attention over the love of your fellow man. And Mr. Distro Raction, you had the story, you understood it too, but you bought into the pomp and ceremony of this town. Until you looked up and the message was forgotten.
St. NICHOLAS: The only person responsible for this theft is YOU!
MR. DISTRO RACTION: Good lands! He’s right!? I have forgotten!
MR. FALLAWAY: I need to call Merry, I need to find that nativity! I need to dissolve my contract -
MRS. NARSIST: I care only of myself. I have to make it right, how can ask my old friends to ever forgive the cold shoulder I gave them!?
[chaos]
JUDGE: ORDER! Order in the court! Mr. Righteous, please explain what you have in mind?
MR. RIGHTEOUS: I would like to call one more witness to the stand, who I believe will sort this whole matter out. This expert witness is the final authority to tell us how to remedy this forgetfulness and theft! I would like to call The bible to the stand.
[silence]
JUDGE: Mr. Righteous. That is a book…
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Your honor, I do not believe it is just a book. It is the living word of God. It not only contains the only accounts we have of the First Christmas, but tells the story -factual and true, and can therefore testify to not only Christ’s birth, but life, death, and resurrection. He is Alive, and so the truth in his Word is alive too- just as true and breathing with his Spirit as it was 2000 years ago!
JUDGE: Alright, I'll allow it.
MR. RIGHTEOUS: I ask, who stands accused according to the Gospel for the true theft of the meaning of christmas?
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Firstly, The citizens of Christmas Town were commanded to not forget:
NARRATOR: In Deuteronomy 4:9, God says, " Only be careful and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live."
MR. RIGHTEOUS: If this is God's Command and Standard, who is guilty of failing?
NARRATOR: Romans 3:23 reads, "For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God's glorious standard."
JUDGE: So everyone has forgotten. Everyone is guilty of stealing the meaning of Christmas
[plaintiffs whisper among themselves]
MR. FALLAWAY: So...if the verdict of this trial is that we are all found guilty...
MRS. NARCIST: What is our punishment?
JUDGE: Mr. Righteous?
MR. RIGHTEOUS: Well, you understand that that is the ending of the christmas story! The Good News! While we were still sinners- still forgetting, still failing- Christ died for us! “You were dead because of your sins and because your sinful nature was not yet cut away. Then God made you alive with Christ, for he forgave all our sins. 14 He canceled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to the cross. 15 In this way, he disarmed the spiritual rulers and authorities. He shamed them publicly by his victory over them on the cross.” Colossians 2: 13-15
JUDGE: so, we were found guilty. But the penalty has been payed. Jesus Took the Penalty for us all! This court is Dismissed. Have yourselves a Merry Christmas, and may the peace of God be with you all. You are all free to go!
[The stage lights dim, as the courtroom clears out slowly, Narrator enters]
NARRATOR:
Twas the Night before Christmas, and all through the town
A new light has dawned, there is new Joy to be found
For 2 thousand years ago, one glorious night
A King has been born to you, what a glorious sight
The people of christmas town remembered their King
Of whom so many years ago, the angels did sing.
The people in darkness have seen a great light
So we pray hearts did change on this Oh Holy Night.
Another Reader:
Romans 8:1-2 “So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. 2 And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death.”
Merry Christmas Everyone!
Comments